If you would like to participate in the Whose Line Is It Anyway game for the Friday BBQ today, please see Pam Ellis as soon as possible.

Our web provider had a massive server failure on Tuesday. To further complicate matters, backup data was corrupted, forcing Chook Industries support staff to resort to local backups. However, all should be fixed now.

Thanks to an anonymous phone call, the identity of the Honey Bun Bandit has been discovered and the employee behind it has been suspended. The matter of getting the Gauntlet machine back is currently being resolved and should be done so by the end of the week. It is a shame that a few must blight company sovereignty by donning the colors of traitorhood.

The laundry machines are not there for employees to do their personal laundry in. Please don't let it happen again.

A note has been left where the Gauntlet machine was reading "We all get ours in the end. Sincerely, The Honey Bun Bandit." If you have knowledge of the origins of this note, please pass that information to Upper Management.

The Gauntlet Machine has been stolen. If you know anything about this, please contact Upper Management as soon as possible.

Larry Snow has returned from his trip to the Outer Banks today.

Would all EMTs please create a daily on-duty roster among themselves so as to prevent the similar instances of confusion that occurred Friday.

-----Original Message-----

Date: Fri, 08 Mar 2002 11:49:37 -0500
To: Chook Industries BBS Task Force 
From: Alice Woods
Subject: Garjoe on Friday

It is Friday, and I'd thought I'd write the Employee BBS just because
I'm in such a good mood.  Happy happy joy joy!  Hehehe, sorry I couldn't
help that.  I had wanted to ask again when the Garjoe Theme is coming
down?  Because I'm actually beginning to like it.  Fridays wouldn't be
the same if it wasn't up.  :P

Alice

A sign up sheet for the bus trip to Mexico has been posted on the bulletin board adjacent to the Chainmail Express. If you have questions, contact Will Jaffe.

Unfortunately a component has failed in the lift drive mechanism. We are committed to replacing the component as soon as its replacement is received. Unfortunately this will not be until Thursday 7 March 2002. Therefore the lift will not be ready to be returned to service until the morning of Friday 8 March 2002. We apologize for the inconvenience that this will cause.

The Church of the Ascended is sending around a letter of universal love which all are encourage to sign in protest of government disinformation. If disinformation continues, we will never learn about mankind's true heritage and our beloved silver brothers and sisters on Venus.

"He saw the world in a way no one could have imagined." John Nash? No, it is Rambling Rob Dylan, musician, magician and street mathematician. Rob says, "The real market of today is in the street and if you can't follow its beat, you ain't gonna have benefits to reap, now read em' and weep." For years Rob has made a name for himself by playing his trusty banjo, Josie-Pusspuss, and telling the world how to tap into the real market's of today's counter-culture. You never know what is going to happen next, or as Rob says, "Hey what's that nickel doing behind your ear?!?!" Be sure not to miss Rob today in the Meridian Room at 4 pm.

An electric fence has been erected around the perimeter of the garbage units. The fence will be in operation 24 hours a day. Please watch yourself.

Normally the Employee BBS does not devote itself to topical news, but since (for no good reason) disinformation has been a recent concern among employees, it was decided to announce that the Government has disbanded it's Pentagon disinformation office. This office was aimed at foreign media sources anyway, and not the Chook Industries fax. So whoever stole the fax paper and left a post it note in the supplies cabinet saying "No faxes are better than lies", can put the fax paper back.